The best words of wisdom, inspiration, motivation, and the kick-in-the-butt that I needed. I am grateful to an amazing support network of women I have come to know and am so appreciative to their generosity in time, advice, and spirit.

I could talk about the challenges and frustrations of the past few months, but that would only further the negativity that has been hanging over me. This is about forward motion and reconnecting with passion to not just make a change, but be the change.

A big thank you to the many wonderful people in my life, but especially to Amy, Lauren, Debra, and Kristin for simply being you.

Last, but certainly not least a big, big thank you to Colin who has always patiently (and persistently) told me to make it happen.

I know the tricks of working through (or avoiding writer’s block). They are invaluable to me and many others, but this isn’t going to be one of those posts.  This isn’t about breaking through writer’s block – it’s about experiencing it. It’s about allowing it to break me, and enable a break through.

overcoming hurdles and creative limitations by experiencing discomfort

We are often quick to want to push through and get to the other side of discomfort.  Whether we’re talking about writer’s block, a personal situation or professional one we try to get through uncomfortable or painful moments as quickly as possible. However, sometimes the really good stuff lives within those raw moments.

Writer’s block is something that’s experienced by many of us. It’s brought on by exhaustion, an inability to focus, lack of passion, disinterest in a subject, stress, or personal distraction. But this is your chance. Acknowledge the discomfort, allow your words to be klunky and awkward. Be free to make no sense at all and jot down a jumble of ideas. Allow yourself the time to dig deeper to find what is really preventing your words and ideas from flowing? Is it fear? Is it boredom? Is it something else entirely?

confronting my own messy little writing demons and insecurities

My writer’s block is rooted in fear. Primarily the fear of what other people think. My insecurities have gotten the better of me and I’m hesitate in my words and ideas. Plus I’m undergoing a major life transition. I have too much in my head, it’s a big tangled mess. I’m painfully untangling everything, and it’s getting messy. Words, ideas, and posts are awkwardly being assembled. It might not be pretty to read or comfortable to write, but I’m on to something. New ideas are forming and directions being taken.

Through identifying the cause of my writer’s block I am confronting my insecurities, breathing them in, experiencing the discomfort, living the questions, and working through them in an imperfect way to me and my ideas to take new form and infused with an even great sense of purpose. Feel free to bear with me, ignore me, or even join me on the journey.

[Image by dirteh fingers via Flickr]

For me, I am seeking something even greater than a community, I am seeking a tribe.  To many this is probably one in the same, but not for me.  Tribal members may come from a variety of the communities I am apart of, but these tribesmen and tribeswomen hold even greater meaning and purpose.  These are soul changes and motivators.  They reach a deeper level.  This is not to say that my communities are minimized, they just serve a different purpose and cause within my life.  Not better or worse, just different.

Satisfying a need for personal and professional growth.  I’d like to say that I am capable of doing everything on my own, but that’s far from the truth.  Growth, personal and professional, comes from the experience and wisdom of others.  It comes from acknowledging our areas (and need) of improvement and opportunity – or sometimes having those areas starkly pointed out to us.  Feedback is a gift, honest feedback from the mouth of someone we respect is an even greater gem.  It is one that we need to reflect upon and be willing to address as well as take action as appropriate.

Satisfying a need for support and motivation.  I want nothing more than to do good and be amazing.  Not in a narcissistic way, but for the betterment of society.  I often find myself stuck and paralyzed by my own ideas (or at times personal frustrations).  I am forever grateful for those who have supported and motivated me quite often when I have been unable to find the silver lining myself.

Opening myself to the journey and creation of a tribe.  Tribes develop organically over time.  We collect people, tribesmen and women, as we go through our lives.  If we’re open, honest, and giving we will soon find ourselves part of a tribe that satisfies, nurtures, and challenges the many facets of our being.  Most often when we least expect it, but when we need it the most. This process requires patience, but most importantly it means that we need to allow ourselves to be vulnerable and humble.

I often worry that I share too many of my shortcomings, insecurities, and confidence waivers.  Now I know that this only makes me human and results in the most beautiful moments and meaningful relationships.

My own tribe is a work in progress.  I do not have physical access to many of them, and some of those I have never met in person, yet they all support, shape, and inspire me daily.  These are individuals who push me to be better.  I pushing myself to be open to and trust in the developing strength, truth, and respect that is found in each of these relationships.

How do you satisfy your need for a community of tribesmen (and women), wisdom filled tribal elders, and those who will stretch you heart, mind, and soul?

[Image by MuseumWales via Flickr]

A personal heart-to-heart. Have you checked in with yourself lately to identify areas where you can improve? Taking a self inventory is incredibly empowering not too mention valuable to those you work with and support. Take a moment to ask yourself: What’s been added to my plate over the past few months? What activities have fallen off the radar – and gone incomplete? Are there areas of value that are no longer getting attention?

We’re always juggling something. For me, it’s several freelance projects and a baby on the way. It’s easy to get caught up in everything and simply look away from items that have gone ignored. However, being able to acknowledge where you can improve makes you better equipped to tackle whatever gets thrown your way. You’re aware and will be able to appropriately allocate yourself to the most important tasks. This type of self awareness is sometimes (and too often) misinterpreted as admitting weakness or failure. Wrong.

Self assessment is about being able to review all aspects of your working self – the good, the bad and the ugly – then doing something to improve the bad and the ugly.

Take manageable bites. Self improvement doesn’t require a complete overhaul, start small. For me, I know “blog commenting” has fallen to the wayside. For a while I was simply kicking myself (…so not a productive response). I read so many wonderful posts daily, but failed to truly contribute or participate in the conversation. It’s something I wanted to fix and focus on – right now.

No time like the present. Therefore each and every day I’ve added to my daily work list: comment on one blog post. Just one. This might seem like a marginal, arbitrary goal, but one is better than zero. One is manageable, I can take my time, be intentional in my contribution, and will enable me to set up a new daily routine. Will I increase this target number, probably, but not yet.

For now, it’s just one comment daily. It’s about identifying an area of improvement and setting up a realistic, non threatening goal to achieve in a sustainable way. From there, I’ll take stock and improve further. The constant self assessing results in an organic checks and balances system that will ensure I’m always learning and offering the best istrategies and solutions to my clients and contributions to my communities.

[Image: Work courtesy of alexanderljung, Flickr]

- I have learned that change is hard.
- Sometimes it is okay to walk away.
- Losing someone you love is never easy.
- Grieving is even harder.
- Old habits are hard to break.

If this year taught me anything, it taught me that I am harder on myself then anyone else could ever know (perhaps with the exception of Colin). Such severe perfectionism will only hold me back. It is time to be open to my own misgivings, mistakes and imperfections.

I have so much more to learn, but before I move into the new year I want to take some time to recharge and reflect. I am going to take this time to sip some tea and soak in all that 2009 has offered. I am going to relish in the moments past and learn to let go of all that holds me back.

It is time for a guilt-free hiatus. One where I can reflect and awaken to all the upcoming excitement, uncertainty and change. It is time to take a break from formal plans, Twitter, blogging, life planning – and take the time to write a love letter, give thanks, take a walk, paint, and simply take in the moment.

Here’s to reflecting, living and loving! See you in 2010.

[Photo courtesy of stillthedudeabides, Flickr]

In one moment you can be so incredibly certain that you’re headed in the right direction – focused, committed, determined. The next, you’re completely unsure of which way to go – who you are, how you got there and where the heck you’re going. It’s taken many days and nights of discomfort to realize that I was upon a major personal and professional shift. Acknowledging this was probably one of the most challenging and liberating self-realizations to date.

Pride and comfort played a large part in the discomfort of this disruption. For over five years I’ve drowned myself in technology, primarily internet, society and new means of communication. Fascinated by it both professionally and personally. In so deep, that it became (and still slightly is) identity forming. It is hard to pull and separate yourself from something that others see you so identified with. Without sounding self centered (typically I’m much more modest), but I do believe that I have the ability to excel in this particular space, but I don’t want to. There was, and still is, a major hurdle holding me back. The scope of such a focus is too narrow, forced and simply exhausting. Ironic, right? We’re talking about technology, it’s infinite, but the particular area in which I was focusing my professional attention just wasn’t the right fit. All pleasure and curiosity I held previously – gone. At least for now, in it’s current incarnation.

Several major life changes have also aided in this intense soul searching. My MBA, a degree that I worked diligently towards for over three years is complete. Something that required so much of my intention, focus and emotion is now done – and with its completion an overwhelming sense of accomplishment, but a hole of uncertainty and responsibility. We have a peanut-to-be scheduled to make an appearance in March. The unexpected emotion and reflection that comes with pending parenthood is truly remarkable and incredibly eye-opening. It’s made me reassess the life I want to have not only for me, but for my growing family and the life I want for my own child.

What next for Left Behind Bottle Caps? Well, I hemmed and hawed over whether I should start a new blog or not, but this blog, like me, has grown, changed and matured. I want to enable it to do so. I don’t want to forget my past interest in social media, but rather integrate my underlying interest in communication and stories into my next career, what ever it may be. I’m also not looking to turn this into a mommy blog (not that there’s anything wrong with mommy blogs) – for now I have decided to keep much of that aspect of my life separate until I feel compelled otherwise.For now, I hope to focus more on the act of creating, the act of living and the act of embracing the many things that inspire me each and every day.

If I’ve learned anything in these past few months it’s that balance and passion in life is everything. I used to think that this was just me, and perhaps it is, but what is life without balance and passion. They should be the pillars of much of what we seek to accomplish in life. So for now, I pursue interests. I’m rekindling my love affair with art (any and all hands-on craft), seeking educational opportunities to delve back into project management and becoming a grammatically better person by pursuing copy editing – maybe even a cooking class or two.

[Photo from Freya Art & Design via Etsy. Truly amazing prints! Please visit her.]

• What Web 2.0 applications do you use? Use the most?
• What do you see as the benefits (personal, professional) of using Web 2.0?
• What are the challenges. restrictions, downsides to Web 2.0?
• Where do you think Web 2.0 is headed?
• How would you recommend a business make use of Web 2.0?

The exercise of responding was cathartic. It was reminiscent of one of those “What the 4th of July Means to Me” essays that were so popular in fifth grade. Oh you know the ones – with complimentary drawing that used a haphazard mix of crayon colors [usually whatever hadn’t yet been snatched up] to depict stick figure families, hot dogs and fireworks.

The point being that everyone drew the same picture – they all wrote the same thing.

They created what was expected – what they thought they were supposed to draw. To me, it sounds all too familiar. Web 2.0 or social media [whichever is your preferred term] is being depicted in a similar fashion. By now, most folks are working diligently to create what looks like the same picture perfect social media strategy. Facebook fan pages, check, Twitter, check, digital video, check, …

Too much thought is going into what appears to represent a “good” social media strategy. It’s not coming back to the audience. Yes, I’ll be the first to tell you that you should not ignore social media, but it can’t be hastily implemented in a disconnected, tool centric fashion.

Get social. Get messy. Don’t give them what you think they want or expect from you. Listen. Wait. Participate. Then give them what they ask for – in innovative new ways. If there was ever an opportunity to color outside the lines this is it.

Heck, break out the finger paints!

Create your own way. Definitions, frameworks and rules aside. Remain mindful of the fundamentals, but be creative and innovative. Time is precious – for both the creator and the audience. It should be fun. As a creator you want to be challenged to provide value in new, unique ways. As part of the audience, we want our attention grabbed. We don’t want the same templated execution, but rather something that doesn’t fit the model – provide bright excitement and raw honesty.

What Social Media Means to Me – by Vanessa Rhinesmith
Please note: this is raw and unedited [grammatical savvy is out with this one]

What Web 2.0 applications do you use? Use the most?
Right now, Twitter, my blog [WordPress] and I’m a HUGE fan of Delicious [social bookmarking is far from dead for me]

What do you see as the benefits (personal, professional) of using Web 2.0?
This is a loaded question. It depends on the company and/or the person. Either way it can be a great way to connect and collaborate with others – remember it’s about collaboration.

What are the challenges. restrictions, downsides to Web 2.0?
The challenges and restrictions are human centric – not everyone wants to listen or participate in the conversation – nor do folks have the means. Remember that not everyone has a computer or access to the internet. The additional downside, is too much hype around Web 2.0 – people aren’t thinking it through they are too wrapped up in the buzz word…[I'll get off my soapbox now].

Where do you think Web 2.0 is headed?
It will become Web3.0, Web4.0…until it’s replaced with a new word. Seriously though, Web3.0 – it’s going mobile and don’t think that virtual is dead. It’s not, oh, and cloud computing.

How would you recommend a business make use of Web 2.0?
First ask, are they ready to LISTEN to their customers and/or employees. Secondly, are they ready to JOIN the conversation in a transparent and collaborative way? Can’t even bring in the tools if you don’t know the actions.

Box of crayons photo courtesy of turbojoe via flickr

Right now I am counting down the week until I have officially completed [and attained] my MBA. That’s right, the end is actually in sight with t-minus seven weeks …and counting. I have several ideas percolating and I hope to find some time to reflect upon them soon.

Be well – and squeeze a little fishing in this summer.

It’s hard to believe that after three years of classes, homework, exams, papers, laughter – and the more than occasional tears, my degree is actually in sight. My second to last semester has been a brutal one, but also full of life lessons learned, which I’m both grateful for and humbled by.

The greatest of those lessons has been creating time. While there are never enough hours in the day, that’s no longer limiting. Instead I welcome the day knowing how much I can accomplish in 24 hours, and part of those hours need to be not just devoted to work and school, but also to me – and the few things I unconditionally cherish.

Right now is me time. The end of the semester is kicking into high gear and that’s where most of my attention will be. The remaining will be spent indulging in moments of clarity as well as with my stellar husband [and his equally stellar band].

So I will be away from blogging – and most personal technology – for an undecided amount of time. Please feel free to read reflections, insight and opinions from the past year, and contact me if you’d like to chat over coffee; since I’ll need plenty of it.

The bar I set for myself academically, personally and professoinally is high; my husband would argue too high. The result is too many hours, on too many things. This morning I was feeling particulary calm, assessing the past 24 hours and looking at the week/month ahead.

In my bag was a piece that I had printed out from Adam Singer, of The Future Buzz. Each morning the The Future Buzz arrives in my mailbox, this was the first morning I had printed it out to read en route into the city. I know not very eco friendly of me, but I read better with tangible sheets of paper. Ironic I know.

This is what I read, Ignoring Others Is Necessary To Reach Your Potential:

Embrace your inner drives and put your soul totally behind them. If others don’t understand then they’re not a supportive force, and you have to learn to ignore them.  I know this is not easy to do, but long term it is necessary.  Choose influences that support what you want to accomplish so you don’t reach a point where those in your life are fighting against you.

I am a big believer in the law of attraction, which states (in brief):

People’s thoughts (both conscious and unconscious) dictate the reality of their lives, whether or not they’re aware of it. Essentially “if you really want something and truly believe it’s possible, you’ll get it”, but putting a lot of attention and thought onto something you don’t want means you’ll probably get that too.

By aligning yourself with those who are supportive, mentoring others who have equal passion, and limiting connections only to those individuals that are going to push you further and increase your focus, you’ll be on a path to your full potential.

Adam, thank you!

Never has something been so timely or resonated so vibrantly. Please know that the print out has not gone to waste as it has taken permanent residence in my bag as a daily reminder and affirmation.