I know the tricks of working through (or avoiding writer’s block). They are invaluable to me and many others, but this isn’t going to be one of those posts.  This isn’t about breaking through writer’s block – it’s about experiencing it. It’s about allowing it to break me, and enable a break through.

overcoming hurdles and creative limitations by experiencing discomfort

We are often quick to want to push through and get to the other side of discomfort.  Whether we’re talking about writer’s block, a personal situation or professional one we try to get through uncomfortable or painful moments as quickly as possible. However, sometimes the really good stuff lives within those raw moments.

Writer’s block is something that’s experienced by many of us. It’s brought on by exhaustion, an inability to focus, lack of passion, disinterest in a subject, stress, or personal distraction. But this is your chance. Acknowledge the discomfort, allow your words to be klunky and awkward. Be free to make no sense at all and jot down a jumble of ideas. Allow yourself the time to dig deeper to find what is really preventing your words and ideas from flowing? Is it fear? Is it boredom? Is it something else entirely?

confronting my own messy little writing demons and insecurities

My writer’s block is rooted in fear. Primarily the fear of what other people think. My insecurities have gotten the better of me and I’m hesitate in my words and ideas. Plus I’m undergoing a major life transition. I have too much in my head, it’s a big tangled mess. I’m painfully untangling everything, and it’s getting messy. Words, ideas, and posts are awkwardly being assembled. It might not be pretty to read or comfortable to write, but I’m on to something. New ideas are forming and directions being taken.

Through identifying the cause of my writer’s block I am confronting my insecurities, breathing them in, experiencing the discomfort, living the questions, and working through them in an imperfect way to me and my ideas to take new form and infused with an even great sense of purpose. Feel free to bear with me, ignore me, or even join me on the journey.

[Image by dirteh fingers via Flickr]

For me, I am seeking something even greater than a community, I am seeking a tribe.  To many this is probably one in the same, but not for me.  Tribal members may come from a variety of the communities I am apart of, but these tribesmen and tribeswomen hold even greater meaning and purpose.  These are soul changes and motivators.  They reach a deeper level.  This is not to say that my communities are minimized, they just serve a different purpose and cause within my life.  Not better or worse, just different.

Satisfying a need for personal and professional growth.  I’d like to say that I am capable of doing everything on my own, but that’s far from the truth.  Growth, personal and professional, comes from the experience and wisdom of others.  It comes from acknowledging our areas (and need) of improvement and opportunity – or sometimes having those areas starkly pointed out to us.  Feedback is a gift, honest feedback from the mouth of someone we respect is an even greater gem.  It is one that we need to reflect upon and be willing to address as well as take action as appropriate.

Satisfying a need for support and motivation.  I want nothing more than to do good and be amazing.  Not in a narcissistic way, but for the betterment of society.  I often find myself stuck and paralyzed by my own ideas (or at times personal frustrations).  I am forever grateful for those who have supported and motivated me quite often when I have been unable to find the silver lining myself.

Opening myself to the journey and creation of a tribe.  Tribes develop organically over time.  We collect people, tribesmen and women, as we go through our lives.  If we’re open, honest, and giving we will soon find ourselves part of a tribe that satisfies, nurtures, and challenges the many facets of our being.  Most often when we least expect it, but when we need it the most. This process requires patience, but most importantly it means that we need to allow ourselves to be vulnerable and humble.

I often worry that I share too many of my shortcomings, insecurities, and confidence waivers.  Now I know that this only makes me human and results in the most beautiful moments and meaningful relationships.

My own tribe is a work in progress.  I do not have physical access to many of them, and some of those I have never met in person, yet they all support, shape, and inspire me daily.  These are individuals who push me to be better.  I pushing myself to be open to and trust in the developing strength, truth, and respect that is found in each of these relationships.

How do you satisfy your need for a community of tribesmen (and women), wisdom filled tribal elders, and those who will stretch you heart, mind, and soul?

[Image by MuseumWales via Flickr]

A little corner where I can share my love for all things colorful, fun, and pretty. Enjoy!

[Photos by the lovely Joanie Tobin, 2010]

I have only one priority in my life – it’s my family. This doesn’t mean that other things, like work, aren’t of importance. In fact, work is a very important part of my life, it challenges me, nurtures me, and enables me to provide for others. But the truth is I would drop everything for them – especially Lucy and Colin.

They are my life as well as the two best cheerleaders anyone could ask for. They ground me. They inspire me. They encouragement me. And perhaps most importantly, they love me, unconditionally. What grounds you? What is the one thing that brings you back to what’s important?

The perks of a nontraditional workspace seem almost endless – no cubicles, tea at the ready and flexible work hours. Though it also requires major self discipline and means holding yourself accountable by developing a workflow that’s flexible, productive and motivating.

Up and at ‘em. Each morning, I tackle the day as if I am in fact heading out the door to an office. None of this working in my bunny slippers stuff. It’s the same deal each day: up no later than 7AM, shower, breakfast, a large pot of tea and an outfit to promote productivity. Dressing for success doesn’t necessarily require you to go anywhere (but you’re ready if you do). You never know when an impromptu meeting or lunch will present itself.

The perfect spot. Usually, I’m not one for working all day from home. Circumstance and limited mobility has resulted in me converting my dining room into the ideal workspace. I’ve reworked the space so I can spread out, be comfortable, productive and most importantly minimize the distractions of being at home. It’s important to know where you work best. Is it one location – or a variety throughout the week or even day.

Routines that work. Find a routine that works for you. Identify what makes you most productive and motivated, then go from there. For me, I know I need to take the time to breakdown tasks, tackling the most important ones during my most productive peaks and making sure I have some form of daily social stimulation. The primary thing I miss about being in an office is the people. I love a good sounding board. Therefore, I leverage networks daily to ensure that I am able to stay connected and challenged.

Make it manageable. Make task lists (daily, weekly and monthly) and employ time management to keep you on track. Identify the priorities – and then break the day into manageable chunks based on client needs and your own. I always make sure to integrate time to write, research, listen and interact with others. The trick is to create a list that’s manageable. Think about what has to get done, considering each item in detail, then note realistic times for each. It’s amazing how quickly even eight to ten hours can be allocated – use them wisely.

Motivational milestones. Working solo means lots of self motivation, especially on tougher days. I thrive on goals. I like to be able to set a goal and work diligently to accomplish it. There’s nothing more motivating or rewarding. Goals come in all shapes and sizes. Set customizable goals weekly to foster not only productivity, but a sense of accomplishment. When setting goals, don’t forget to include ones specifically for you. If you’re a freelancer, make sure you make time to market and better yourself weekly.

Setting boundaries. Perhaps my own greatest challenge is knowing when it’s time to stop. It can be easy to work all day, but I don’t – and neither should you. To ensure maximum output and avoid burning out be sure to decide when you’ll be shutting down – and try to stick to it. Be flexible and let the day’s workload help you decide on that particular day’s length, but remember to be diligent in this practice. Otherwise, it will all just run into each other and the freedom, enjoyment and balance of freelancing dissolves – with work/life balance going out the window.

Flexible working is a great opportunity for many of us. It enables us to pick and choose the projects we are most passionate about, while being able to do so in a manner that’s conducive to our own lives. Though it’s up to us to toss out those fuzzy slippers and establish a workflow and community that maximizes productivity, quality and satisfaction, while fostering accountability and promoting balance.

[Image: Green Fuzzy Slippers courtesy of Jamiesrabbits, Flickr]

A personal heart-to-heart. Have you checked in with yourself lately to identify areas where you can improve? Taking a self inventory is incredibly empowering not too mention valuable to those you work with and support. Take a moment to ask yourself: What’s been added to my plate over the past few months? What activities have fallen off the radar – and gone incomplete? Are there areas of value that are no longer getting attention?

We’re always juggling something. For me, it’s several freelance projects and a baby on the way. It’s easy to get caught up in everything and simply look away from items that have gone ignored. However, being able to acknowledge where you can improve makes you better equipped to tackle whatever gets thrown your way. You’re aware and will be able to appropriately allocate yourself to the most important tasks. This type of self awareness is sometimes (and too often) misinterpreted as admitting weakness or failure. Wrong.

Self assessment is about being able to review all aspects of your working self – the good, the bad and the ugly – then doing something to improve the bad and the ugly.

Take manageable bites. Self improvement doesn’t require a complete overhaul, start small. For me, I know “blog commenting” has fallen to the wayside. For a while I was simply kicking myself (…so not a productive response). I read so many wonderful posts daily, but failed to truly contribute or participate in the conversation. It’s something I wanted to fix and focus on – right now.

No time like the present. Therefore each and every day I’ve added to my daily work list: comment on one blog post. Just one. This might seem like a marginal, arbitrary goal, but one is better than zero. One is manageable, I can take my time, be intentional in my contribution, and will enable me to set up a new daily routine. Will I increase this target number, probably, but not yet.

For now, it’s just one comment daily. It’s about identifying an area of improvement and setting up a realistic, non threatening goal to achieve in a sustainable way. From there, I’ll take stock and improve further. The constant self assessing results in an organic checks and balances system that will ensure I’m always learning and offering the best istrategies and solutions to my clients and contributions to my communities.

[Image: Work courtesy of alexanderljung, Flickr]

- I have learned that change is hard.
- Sometimes it is okay to walk away.
- Losing someone you love is never easy.
- Grieving is even harder.
- Old habits are hard to break.

If this year taught me anything, it taught me that I am harder on myself then anyone else could ever know (perhaps with the exception of Colin). Such severe perfectionism will only hold me back. It is time to be open to my own misgivings, mistakes and imperfections.

I have so much more to learn, but before I move into the new year I want to take some time to recharge and reflect. I am going to take this time to sip some tea and soak in all that 2009 has offered. I am going to relish in the moments past and learn to let go of all that holds me back.

It is time for a guilt-free hiatus. One where I can reflect and awaken to all the upcoming excitement, uncertainty and change. It is time to take a break from formal plans, Twitter, blogging, life planning – and take the time to write a love letter, give thanks, take a walk, paint, and simply take in the moment.

Here’s to reflecting, living and loving! See you in 2010.

[Photo courtesy of stillthedudeabides, Flickr]

Right now I am counting down the week until I have officially completed [and attained] my MBA. That’s right, the end is actually in sight with t-minus seven weeks …and counting. I have several ideas percolating and I hope to find some time to reflect upon them soon.

Be well – and squeeze a little fishing in this summer.

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Are you 100% Sexy.

You are working at the edges of a lot of this stuff, and your experiences, reflections, and wisdom is very important to share. The currency of human relationship is really evolving here. Its possible to know a gazillion people online, but how does this impact our truest sense of community and our deeper desires for authentic connections and real relationships. I would love for you to say more about why you chose to do this now in this way, and your observations of what has changed for you since making this shift.

There are several pieces to which I wanted to publicly respond, starting with the statement, “the currency of human relationship is really evolving.” Human relationships are evolving. The greatest question that arises is how do we define the currency of human relationships: is it reflected in the quantity of those relationships or is it found in the quality. Right now it would appear that quantity is the preferred currency with individuals being judged by the number of connections via Twitter, Facebook or LinkedIn.

If quantity is becoming the universal measure, or currency, then we may in fact be looking at the de-evolution of human relationships. To me quantity of online relationships alone is shallow and hollow. It lacks the substance critical to a sustaining relationship. It forgoes true community and lacks authenticity. Though this is largely an argument based on perception it does in fact resonate with the way most of us approach our physical relationships, but not always synonymous with our digital ones.

The evolution of community, relationship and communication lies in quality. It’s about the blending of technology and fundamental community/relationship building. The web, and our online connections (ten or ten thousand), aid us in achieving impact of that quality, whether personal, mission or business centric. All of which are therein rooted in an association with a community that can be represented in something as simplistic as an online community/website (such as Etsy) or a brick and mortar institution like the Berkman Center. By the nature of our online habits, many of us are associated with communities even if we don’t recognize or vocally associate with that community.

I chose to define my personal online presence to live what I believe. I was being spread way to thin across the web and all incarnations of my relationships were feeling the strain. Concentration of my efforts and connections to my more intimate relationships can in fact have a far greater impact. I think this is key. Concentration of intention – the ripple will be huge. This is where I love the web, it enables the ripple to be manifested in a wide range of mediums, inclusive of both digital and physical means.

Doyle asked me about my observations, “what has changed for you since making this shift.” Personally, I feel lighter. I’m able to take the time to process and refocus my attention and energy. Professionally, I feel refreshed. I’m able to further develop an understanding of what’s needed in order to achieve the goals of both the organization I strive to support and the community I work to nurture.

Intellectually, I feel calm. I’m able to observe and digest the sociological shift in a way that focuses in on the foundation of such a technological revolution. Too soon do we forget that it’s about mindful, intentional and quality implementation of technology – and that community and authentic relationships require nurturing beyond the paradoxical limitations of the internet.