I was incredibly humbled and inspired by Doyle’s recent comment regarding my declaration of setting digital boundaries:

You are working at the edges of a lot of this stuff, and your experiences, reflections, and wisdom is very important to share. The currency of human relationship is really evolving here. Its possible to know a gazillion people online, but how does this impact our truest sense of community and our deeper desires for authentic connections and real relationships. I would love for you to say more about why you chose to do this now in this way, and your observations of what has changed for you since making this shift.

There are several pieces to which I wanted to publicly respond, starting with the statement, “the currency of human relationship is really evolving.” Human relationships are evolving. The greatest question that arises is how do we define the currency of human relationships: is it reflected in the quantity of those relationships or is it found in the quality. Right now it would appear that quantity is the preferred currency with individuals being judged by the number of connections via Twitter, Facebook or LinkedIn.

If quantity is becoming the universal measure, or currency, then we may in fact be looking at the de-evolution of human relationships. To me quantity of online relationships alone is shallow and hollow. It lacks the substance critical to a sustaining relationship. It forgoes true community and lacks authenticity. Though this is largely an argument based on perception it does in fact resonate with the way most of us approach our physical relationships, but not always synonymous with our digital ones.

The evolution of community, relationship and communication lies in quality. It’s about the blending of technology and fundamental community/relationship building. The web, and our online connections (ten or ten thousand), aid us in achieving impact of that quality, whether personal, mission or business centric. All of which are therein rooted in an association with a community that can be represented in something as simplistic as an online community/website (such as Etsy) or a brick and mortar institution like the Berkman Center. By the nature of our online habits, many of us are associated with communities even if we don’t recognize or vocally associate with that community.

I chose to define my personal online presence to live what I believe. I was being spread way to thin across the web and all incarnations of my relationships were feeling the strain. Concentration of my efforts and connections to my more intimate relationships can in fact have a far greater impact. I think this is key. Concentration of intention – the ripple will be huge. This is where I love the web, it enables the ripple to be manifested in a wide range of mediums, inclusive of both digital and physical means.

Doyle asked me about my observations, “what has changed for you since making this shift.” Personally, I feel lighter. I’m able to take the time to process and refocus my attention and energy. Professionally, I feel refreshed. I’m able to further develop an understanding of what’s needed in order to achieve the goals of both the organization I strive to support and the community I work to nurture.

Intellectually, I feel calm. I’m able to observe and digest the sociological shift in a way that focuses in on the foundation of such a technological revolution. Too soon do we forget that it’s about mindful, intentional and quality implementation of technology – and that community and authentic relationships require nurturing beyond the paradoxical limitations of the internet.

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One Response to the de-evolution of community, relationships and the currency of quality

  1. Georgy says:

    In my (limited) experience, movements and shifts always begin with quantity, but through natural selection, quality usually wins out in the end. The net (no pun intended) is always cast wide, but in the end, we only bring the best of the catch to shore.

    The decisions you are making and the boundaries you are drawing are part of that natural selection — the choices of individuals will be reflected in the shift of entire communities and culture. So I don’t think quantity will win out in the end, at least in terms of our current concerns. But surely, something else will come along, and in the dawn of that age, everyone will swoop in and measure its value (and their own within it) by numbers. And it will all begin anew.

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